Reflections on the Belonging Conference
August 22, 2024
By Peter McLalleN
I recently had the opportunity of attending the Belonging Conference (June 13-15, 2024) held by The Christian Alliance for Inclusive Development at Eastern University. This conference was a gathering of women and men working together to develop “organizational cultures that welcome women fully.” The space created was warm and welcoming. As a man, and particularly a white man, it is helpful to be in these environments to hear and learn about the challenges women, and particularly minority women, face in the workplace.
Nikki Lerner led a plenary session on “Overcoming Fear at the Kingdom Table.” She spoke of the relationship between fear and doubt. While there is a need to address fear, she made the point that fear is connected to doubt. Fear is a natural feeling that has protective qualities. Doubt is a questioning, often of our own abilities and perspectives, that can prevent us from living into what God has called us to be. Fear is overcome by courage. Doubt is overcome by belief.
She pointed out that belief in ourselves and the abilities that God has given to us is an act of faith. It recognizes that God is with us; we are made in God’s image; and we are called to our work. She encouraged the audience to listen to the still small voice of God telling us who we are and not the large noise of our doubt. She highlighted that doubt in one’s abilities can develop when one does not feel heard or seen in an organizational setting.
Other speakers shared ways in which organizations can create environments for doubt to arise. One area is communication. I have heard and observed how the voices and ideas of women (and minorities) can be marginalized in a group setting, for example, when a woman makes a comment that may be ignored or dismissed by men in the room. However, if a man makes a similar remark (after the woman has) it is accepted and even lauded as a good idea without any acknowledgement that the point was already made. It was noted that when such occurrences happen repeatedly, doubt in one’s ideas and perspectives can begin to creep in and decrease effectiveness. When people are confronted, however, they are confused or bewildered, usually because they were unconscious of the situation and their role in it. They often note that they were not trying to do this but simply trying to make a point. (I know I have done this on more than one occasion). Changing this dynamic can lead to honoring those around us and a culture the fully welcomes others.
How can we create a healthier environment for women to flourish in our organizations? First, work to listen carefully to what others are saying, rather than simply thinking of your own point. Then preface a comment with a simple acknowledgement of what the other person said. For example, “I would like to reiterate the point that Nicola made,” or “I would like to expand on Theresa’s comment about ___”. In doing this, one acknowledges and honors what others have said, and builds the conversation.
Building organizational cultures that welcome women fully, will mean that we men need to face our fear of losing influence or control with courage. It takes courage to listen to the women in our organizations in ways that we really hear what they are saying. We need to set aside the loud noise of doubt to listen to the quiet voice of God. This requires a renewed belief that God is the one building our organizations and wants to engage all Jesus followers in the process.